Identifying Signs

Signs of weak boundaries

Who Struggles with Boundaries?

Almost everyone struggles with boundaries, because they never saw the adults in their family have them.

Most of us in some form are operating with programs and patterns of codependency.

This is because as children our learning came from modelling behaviour.

We struggle with boundaries because that is what we saw, and our society also rewards this type of behaviour too. 

But we don’t ever look into how these people feel a little deeper.

Here is what we don’t always see:

• The state of their health
• The satisfaction and health of their relationships
• Resentments creeping in, or built up
• Temper and frustration
• Early disease manifesting
• Depression or anxiety

Whilst some people have strong and well set boundaries, others are only just coming to realise they actually need them, and this is most of society.

This might bring a sigh of relief to learn this, you are not alone.

In my experience, even people who have strong and well set boundaries can struggle.

Sometimes we get stuck in our boundary.

Wrapped up tightly and rigid to our ideas, and as a result miss out on connection, experiences and can even block the flow of life.

Signs of Weak Boundaries

Everyone can benefit from building boundaries, but you will really notice the effects of this skill if you have these signs:

• You find it hard to say no.
• You don't speak up even when you're treated badly
• You give away too much of your time and energy
• You feel under appreciated and taken for granted
• You say ‘yes’ when you really want to say ‘no’
• You feel guilty for doing something for yourself
• You constantly make sacrifices for others at your own expense
• You repeatedly find yourself in unhealthy, one-sided relationships
• You believe you must always put others before you to earn a place in this life
• You over-share details about your life, even with strangers
• You frequently “melt into” the people you like or admire and adapt their preferences and personalities
• You’ve been putting everyone else before you that you don't even know what YOU want or need anymore
• You allow others to touch you even when you feel uncomfortable
• You are passive aggressive
• You always feel like the victim
• You have a hard time making decisions